You know Satan I've had it. Everyday I'm out here I get more pissed off at what I see and live everyday. I take a step back to collect my thoughts and I get accused of quitting because people have their own idea of what walking away and taking a time out really is all about. Especially when I know who I am. I know and understand cause and effect of my emotions and people find fault. Truth be told I'm not sure if people can really go through what I have gone through in just this last year alone and stay sane. I assure you I am sane and I am perfectly clear about the truth in what I see. All the way around. People have this idea that this planet is gonna end or that I am saying it's going to be the end of the world.
I have never one time said this world is ending. I have said it is going to end as we see it today. I had no idea what new day was or time for a new dawn even meant. Especially that I am the New Dawn. Who would of thunk? You know before I put the bigger picture together of just what they wanted me to see I didn't even know there was more to see. I knew nothing about Babylon. I wondered why I was taking numbers and dates straight across the board and coming up with twelve. People have no idea what happened on those days that I added up to twelve, but I do. I had never done or had any idea to do such a thing. It was a couple of weeks ago that some pasture was adding numbers straight across the board and coming up with whatever Satan's numbers are as well as his own.
Hell astounded was more like it. It wouldn't be the first time right brother? I mean when Michael played a joke and pretended to be shocked and scared seeing a pile of clothes lying on the ground. I had no idea what he was talking about. He explained that when the rapture happens people are going to disappear all at once. For awhile I still thought it was like a lil ping over hear and maybe a lil while later another ping. I had no idea it was going to happen all at once. Hell that was news to me. Which explains the crash I see. People in planes trains and automobiles. Mothers holding children in there arms will vanish into thin air.
Stock market crash, but of course that's a given. I believe its Germany that has the bomb that can shut down all of our technology and kill all off our batteries. I mean I wasn't happy years ago when cell phones started coming out taking over and land lines were disappearing. That makes mankind pretty vulnerable right brother? When you think about it what would be the perfect plan than to do this take over right before our elections. Again that is so rigged its a joke. Right at a time when we are being taught to tolerate the poison in our bodies in the healthcare system, our food and water. Then making our bodies tolerate not only synthetic food but synthetic drugs which were really only meant for short term use or maybe long term use for certain ailments. Not the same drugs being used to put a band aid on for long term use for pretty much every ailment and everybody.
I mean look at our cable? Air waves already set up all around the globe and we just keep re-paying that tab everyday over and over different contracts that say we have the right to change this contract when we please. I mean really Satan I realized just why I had the jobs and carriers I have had. Contracts and insurance is huge in my life. Like I can't read a contract. Hell I used to sell insurance along with a school loan plan even. I learned about dimensions in Mr. Lee's Beauty school in High School and even more so training at Gene Juarez ATC as a hair designer. I actually had Nara from the "Lil Blue House of Lost Mothers" come right out and say to me well Colleen I know the contract says you can be gone five nights a month but it is implied four. Not much different than our justice system. It was supposed to be innocent until proven guilty, certainly not no more. More fines for each state on shit they are causing.
Basic cable is pretty much sales shows or all these reality shows. They are a lie. The one I hate the most is the bachelorette . I mean everyone is on the edge of their seat wondering who he is gonna pick? I just think WTF! Does no one else see anything wrong with a young woman standing in line with a bunch of other young women waiting to be picked. Some are based on love in ten seconds with just a kiss. Some are based on if he's rich. Now they aren't all bad my point is this is becoming the norm to watch instead of the truth of what is going on all around us.
I walk away, I go back home to my woods where I feel the safest. I mean I know some weird and scary shit happened this isn't even close to all that happened to me and others. When I think about it I got my training wheels on that land. I hated when I moved back from California all the camping and land has been taken over by the state. I mean yeah it's nice and all a shower on site, a restroom, neighbors. Truth be told that isn't camping that is taking your home and moving it somewhere else. Which is pretty much what I did when my girls were little.
Before that you find land pitch a tent or we'd hit a beach in our sleeping bags. I'd hook my dogs leash up to water jugs so they couldn't wonder off. Their is freedom to jut going into the woods with my head phones, and just being. Out here I can never be alone. Out here when you have to rent a room in someone else's home you can't just be. Someone else is always telling how to live or where to live. My ex knew he got half my income and this is how I have had to live for a long time. I didn't want my children in some of the places I had to live to have a roof over my head.
Know when he got custody. The winter I worked in Redmond and all the storms and power outages. Gas station closures. I worked for a company that we were told if we leave due to the weather we'd be fired. I got stranded more than a few times and I told him the truth.It was also the same winter when I had a landlord that wouldn't fix a heating element. Me and my children had no heat that winter so I had to hand them over. He was angry, but truth be told he had a wood stove and generator, I did not. He had the propane BBQ outside to feed them, I did not. So yes during that time I gave my children to their father so they could eat, be warm and be in a safe secure place with their father. You want to blame me then blame away. I call the police and they would say it was it wasn't a police matter that I'd have to take him to court.
So out in the woods I have come up with other stuff as they walk me though my life. My favorite moment was when they introduced to my third unborn daughter, Jimmie Jane. That was beautiful who knew. I was wondering.
Other topics today or when I get a chance
The customer is always wrong
The Truth in humility
Milky Way
I finally got Gary in a clear space and I have permission to tell his story and why he is out there.
One will be called "Ode to Gary" the other "Ode to Jimmie Jane"
These treatment centers and mental institutions and what needs to change for these people.
Safeway, safe way comes up allot. Especially that semi that almost killed me when I was eighteen and nothing happened. So many close calls car wrecks, you have no idea.
Doors and pathways
Planting seeds
Who knows what is going to piss me off till then.
This planet being part of the heavenly plan.
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