The Conjuring of BABALON

I Drive Your Truck by LB
No other fitting title I could come up with. Let me backtrack some. I woke up early Friday morning around 1 a.m. Michael was watching Paranormal Activity, Ghost Dimensions again. At times I really try to avoid shows of a certain genre.

She's My Kind Of Rain by TM
I don't want to be triggered and go looking something up. This history lesson in everything has been a long long road. When I watched it the first time, it was the mother walking through that black cloud of energy going to her daughters bed? We as humans over time no longer feel this we are so used to it. Of course the symbols around the daughters bed? The portal, the door to the dark dimension?

My Baby Loves Me by MM
Then it hit me wait a minute didn't God say something about midwives, Wicca's and Merlin's?  As usual I pause for a moment and if I don't understand I let it go until I am shown again. The Midwives, it's those midwives, it's the witchcraft, the dark ones, stealing our babies bodies and souls all these centuries. The innocents. Nothing more trusting than a child. Woof! The Wolfe in Sheep clothing I've been looking for. I mean really, why am I still out here? Lets do this already. Torture comes to mind.

Another Try by JT/TY
Then it was the goat in the end with the seven eyes. OMG! I've been wondering where that goat was? Who is the goat? What is the representation of this evil Goat? Coincidence? The mans name training the girls? Toby, the name of my first little girl crush. Pre-school or kindergarten not sure. He was a waif of a blond haired blue eyed little guy. I had it all planned out. We were going to take our trikes and live in the back of my step dads pick up truck. I felt sorry for him. I wanted to protect him.

I Melt by RF Hands by Jewel
Tears again. I had been going off about the conjuring of BABALON. Well that's what I call it. What else would you call this God? Losing my shit at JC. Who conjures? Why would anyone want to conjure anything? I don't understand why anyone would willingly go to the dark side? Right there in Revelations the different genres from God's mouth, so how can religion, this legal system or any system write it all off as fiction and hogwash? Pisses me off, if the truth hadn't been hidden, if you priest weren't so focused on sin and shame, hell fire we wouldn't be here. No better way than to control humanity than to use a few of God's passages to control the audience, knowing full well you are giving your own misguided interpretation is changing Gods word. He told you so. Back to Liber 49 I go once again, to re-read this story. Something caught my eye? The crossing of generation lines I saw. So back I go to look at it from a different perspective.

I Breathe In, I Breathe Out by CC
Then I see it? The nine knocks and Alistair Crowley hearing "let me out". The one lamp burned out and guess who is standing in the room in front of him. Michael the Arch Angel and ISIS. Yes. Score. Touchdown. Two different genres cross paths the other Egyptian Mother who's husband just happens to be The Sun God Atum. The third Adam out there. Atom energy, Adam the garden with Eve and Atum the Sun God.

Somewhere With You by KC Realize by C.C.
It was the confusion of all these different genres from the start. Fertility Goddess Freya, ISIS and Lakota.

I Don't Want To Miss A Thing by MC
I saw standing in the kitchen a open hand reaching out to me. I had to stop and think two years ago, I was like no way. I have to see this through no matter what. After all this pain. After all this truth would I still say no? I fully understand that they wanted me alone, no outside influence in the last two years. Especially after reading that God had a plan for Crowley all along. Another scientific, another genius who understood energy. Science is one way of understanding energy, yet once you understand its not all a scientific energy, your horizons expand. Spirit's are energy. Some dark, some light.  You as a human being are a spirit energy.

Let Me Go by Faith
Yet because science doesn't want to see anything they can't control they ostracize and he lost his fortunes and his livelihood for a couple of years. His reputation in the toilet. I don't understand this 666 or who the Fra. guy is yet.? I no longer care actually. My whole life, take the good leave the bad.

I Saw God Today by GS
I told JC yesterday, I don't want to hear another love song after this is over. Thinking again just about every genre is just chalked full of love songs. Whether pain and loss of love, excited over your new love, or just at peace and happy. Bottom line is everyone's basic instinct on this planet is to be loved or to love. It's flocked up right now and it makes me cry. I'll do my best to do as they ask of me to save this rock and His children. I love the rebel side. I always see the light in the rebellion, it's the heart hidden, and who's heart you really belong too.

I'm In by KU  All I Wanna Do by Sheryl Crow
I do not understand why everyone thinks JC and Gods return is going to be peaceful at first? I mean the second coming and in my beady human mind I know I still don't comprehend the full grasp. The destruction on this rock and on mankind's heart kills me inside. My babies? So close, yet so far. One good thing Alex's wedding is postponed. I feel like a shit mother for feeling this way. My job is to be stronger than my babies no matter the anger, they are the children and I the mother.

Picture

 Like I can't see all along how God has guided them and how my family just happens to be there all along. I mean my God like Alex isn't the apitomy of the Cinderella daughter making a difference working her ass off. Trying to get it all done. Reliving her mothers life all over. So yup I admit, I'm leaving this up to God because no matter what I say she's going to shatter, she's going to come all undone and well as a mother I don't want that either. She's still kicking. She's just living her own hard knox life in society. She is the epitome of survival, a product of society in this age group. Me, I want to slap her, hug her, and cry all at once. So it's best I stay put. My emotions are raw, on my heart sleeves for my lil' angel in disguise.

Then the other one my RiKi. Couldn't be more angry about this one right here and all she's missed out sitting in that box always at someone else's beck n call to the point of becoming paranoid if one thing is out of place. The headaches with both. How she handles herself to survive emotionally. Yes, they have both adapted quite well to their swurroundings in each there own way. I want this one out of the box. This one is the apitomy of living in a nunnery serving God. Well I can truly see on Gud's side why he has placed her in her situation and the benefits. As a human mother I see the decline in my heart. Just the topic and point with this one kills me.

Vice by M.L.

It's well past due for this mother and daughter to have the talk. Even though I lost my virginity at fifteen, it did not become a open door for others like kids today and their is nothing wrong with that. Their ain't no rush.

Already Gone by Sugarland

 I know one thing to marry your first love sexually with the expectation of the rest of your life is not a good idea for success. It's a pretty high expectation to be treated like someone else's sperm bag for the rest of your life. The rest of your life is a long time for disrespect and lack of knowledge. Lack of understanding how sex mixes with love for the rest of your life. Truth is I've been studying up on this sexuality and gender issues, that exposure to the open door? That open flesh? Male versus female? Being gay or curious. Child's play or the stigmata of the labels we place on your children? A permanent label for being curious? The flesh and intimacy of the openness male versus female energy wise? Who is anyone to judge? Yes after the week I've had and what I've had to even ask myself about my own discoveries, not even I'm sure how far God wants me to go with this conversation with her now? I mean this timing thing is killing me. Another form of Torture, right God? 

Head Over Feet by AM

My KiKi out there alone and I want her home with me. I can't tell them the Truth, they would freak out. Plus Alex won't let me speak, she is scared. Both of them are? It's their mother who is going to be killed. After reading this all of humanity. I mean I've been studying up on Judgement day. I'm so ready. I want off this enterprise please! Jump bail, but I'd just get brought back. It's been hell it became hella funny about an hour ago as some things sank in. Who says God doesn't have a sense of humor? 

Stupid Boy by KU

Then some will return and others will stay home in heaven until they are ready. Well others 1000 years is all you get? That is not enough Justice to me for what you have done all these centuries to my rock. My family. No sirree Bob! Not this Mother get's a vote in all this. I want it times dog years. I don't mean big dog years, the sixes. Hell I'm the little dog, so you can times that by seven. With some compounded interest to boot. I am so fed up with walking through this shit of a system. 

God Love Her by TK
I read through BABOLON'S  list of what is going to go down numerically with JC. There it was the different stages of hell I am walking through. Right along with those nine layers of hell in Dante's Inferno.  What The Mother Flocking Stage am I at now God? 

Kiss Me by Sixpence

I'm at the library once again having to pack up all my shit with a timer going off because my blog won't connect to the server and if I look at another reader board I'm going to explode. I've got money today and I will pay for someone to just deal with this technology. That is just it in everything. How much ya' gonna pay? How much ya' gonna put out for all this technology? Another cock block. More excuse for more advertising and fee's because they likely had another buy out. Time to pay up. So you shall suffer. We will make your life hell.  "Oh please daddy let me blow it up. Today is just one of those days I want to blow things up. Don't you ever feel like that. Just getting out some aggression, in a healthy way. Nothing wrong with that, right daddy? It seems I'm going to school to learn a little more about myself. I got money in my pocket and I'm ready for a time out. I'm ready to pack up my tent and get the fuck out of dodge for a few days.

Once again I'm going to get pissed off. Whether I am siting on a rock, or in my tent peacefully. Here comes the police. Someone is missing something, and here comes the cops. I call them and they don't come. OMG! Someone is smoking over by the well. OMG! She's saying a prayer as she dances around. Better call out the squad, she might be a danger to someone. I mean I popped into town and Thank God Michael was driving. The only day and time to get my printer and once again our car get's profiled. I have put up with small town cops being a white woman and profiling for years and years. Robo Cop. Bitch I'll let my family take care of you. All the time wasted because somebody want's to prove they are right. So they go to far and they won't let up. Even after two hours and their superior officer telling her so. Get a life. Get a job that you can where honorably. A badge and having something to prove do not go hand in hand. I'm sure you fellow officers have nothing to do with a fellow female police officer having to feel this way, do you? 

Born To Run by B.S.

It did finally dawn on my I'm The Joker. It even says so in BABALON. Number she declares, "I BABALON, then on to number two. All the way down the list, Standing next to JC, "do you think! My God, do you think!" I feel all of this, gee it seems so familiar. right down to number ten. I got something to say about number ten. Got down to about the forties making my notes and connecting the dots. Sitting in the car on the way to North Bend to get my printer finally I was analyzing what I had read, going over it step by step so I found the goat.

Be Like That

Then ISIS and Michael were standing together. BABALON was out and about with Michael and ISIS three different generations. When Alex went to conjure up the BABALON someone else went in a box. Then I let definitely a bald male off the chains in my dream. I knew I was right because my index finger tapped my nose. For the last couple of days I had been thinking about what does that palm mean? What does it really mean? Other things had been coming to mind. like Jesus, Angel, and Eye means JAE. Angel Jesus Eye means AJE or Angel EYE Jesus means AEJ another way. I did say in the beginning time for a new day, time for a new dawn. Time for a new AJE. This Lil' JAE is going to speak volumes. 

Call Me by Shinedown

I promise you all, I have switched music. I have been giving thumbs up to get more funk in my writing and dancing and this mother flocking Pandora keeps playing the same stuff. I mean God Dammit if I hear another Almost Heaven or Landslide, I will scream. No matter the station, no mater the thumbs up, it keeps going back to this. Tom Petty where are you when I need you.

So Far Away

Then other things started to dawn on me in the car. Wait a minute you brought me into this as the little sister to my own brother, then you showed me my brother and my father. You brought me into the Garden Of Eden once again as the little sister of two brothers, and a daughter. Then you made me a wife and mother. Yes once again I noticed the incestuous relationship in BABALON. You all have such a incestuous relationship in all these big books don't you? I noticed the eight names of Alex Crowley's daughter also. The names just go on don't they? Back around we go. Is it Hope in the box or is it some kind of bad demon trying to escape? Ride on BABALON'S coat tails? I spent a couple days accepting my calling. Trying to get a feel.

Fortunate Son by CCWR

I've been feeling restless, the word tortured comes to mind in this family. I was walking home from the A line one day and I asked God? Why all this torture and how come JC only had to hang on the cross? Yes I've changed my tune. How come he got to know? How come his whole body didn't have to hurt this long? 

BOYS Of Summer

Yeah I know some days I feel like a ungrateful little brat. Hell you put me here. Why are you dragging this out? Why all this torture? Why all this pain? (Yeah I know I'm going to eat crow. I do get the impression some moments he wants to pop me on the ass and send me to bed too, I don't care.) Then he tells me, because your the mother, you have to be stronger than the son. I didn't even lose it. I didn't have a turret's episode where I yell "asshole! I hate you!" My re-action is improving or maybe I'm winding down, I am a geriatric after all.

Sweet Home Alabama

I stopped walking and I stomped my right foot and did a awe shucks with my arms. I'm softening up, some. I mean what choice do I have right? Yet I have to wonder what are you setting me up for? All this no pain, no gain shit? I sat and wrote and when I looked up at the address it was cross street nineteen at 1900, I laughed.  I got my MRI results back and lets just say my left wing is fucked up. It's not going to be an easy fix. I am hoping for a quick in and out. A short re-coop period. I am so sick and tired of the loss. I keep losing all the muscle and physical therapy that I have done to my body over and over. Rebuilding it each time once again. It is absurd trying to get through all this red tape. Took three phone calls to make one appointment. Still couldn't make it because once again no x-rays, just the notes. I have to go get a disc made, in the mean time she has to wait to get the copy of the original herself before I can even be seen.

Beast Of Burden

I don't care what anyone says. I keep moving through the pain and I'm getting stronger. When I explained to my new doctor once again how my muscles are pulling on my hip joints, as well as the crooked coccyx, she said "no Colleen if that was the case, you'd hurt right here" She pushes her finger in my glute and I yelled. OOWWW! Do you think? This is the stuff that I'd like to discuss with a doctor to help me get through this, and keep me going strong. I haven't even gotten to the table for my spine. They left me blowing in the wind for over two years. 

The Joker

There is no excuse for what happened last summer. I almost suffocated from these pills. I kept telling them, the pain is different. Since October I have had to start over and detox my own pancreas. I have had to keep moving because if I don't it's going to hurt worse elsewhere. It has all been painful for me to even get this far and be ignored because of that big A that was put on my chest twenty years ago. Two surgeries back to back. Right after I go off them for four months and I was on them for four months. I go see my lawyer on nothing,exhausted she tells me to go to rehab. I thought I could use some time off and learn who I am again. 

Human Touch by B.S.

I take two pills. I saw a lion in my mind and I did the right thing. I went to get the tools to learn how to handle it. Not even the doctors knew back then I was going to get rebound pain from them. No one knew, From there over the years I went to two pain clinics, told them the truth about the side effects and how it's not working. Told I was lying. No one knew all along or even bothered to find out. I've been stuck between A.A. and my sociopath X, who stole everything before I even crashed and fell. 

Bad Moon Rising by CCR

I have been feeling like an other lately. My skin color? Am I white? Who am I? I feel like I'm on Laurel and Hardy. Who's on first, kind of thing. Then the day the other shoe dropped. It wasn't a thud. Nope it was a whoosh. For once I ws speechless. Me speechless. I know.