Ruby Tuesday/The Rolling Stones
I recon they are taking me back around to some past memories and names. Kinda like "Gaia just download me already." Then it takes me 2 family. I find out Venus is in charge with downloading, on this rock and in the heaven's. Who say's it's not Jack's house? A couple other fairy names came up in the beginning, Wendy and Tink. I didn't know why but I felt like it had something to do with the lost boys? We all have a war to fight. These gangs and clubs standing on the corners in their colors. The Hells Angels with wings on their back and Castle Rock. Now look Stephen King how telling. My last mistreatment center. What a joke. "Are U my mother? Are U my father?" Looking for family people. Hey we all have our crosses 2 bare. We all have our wars to fight. Then Pan. Peter Pan and the Gin, Pan. My X again. The whole jumping from the skillet to the fry pan. I was wondering why I was seeing myself standing inside a bottle like I dream of Jeannie hitting the cork with my fist "let me out of the bottle?"
I recon they are taking me back around to some past memories and names. Kinda like "Gaia just download me already." Then it takes me 2 family. I find out Venus is in charge with downloading, on this rock and in the heaven's. Who say's it's not Jack's house? A couple other fairy names came up in the beginning, Wendy and Tink. I didn't know why but I felt like it had something to do with the lost boys? We all have a war to fight. These gangs and clubs standing on the corners in their colors. The Hells Angels with wings on their back and Castle Rock. Now look Stephen King how telling. My last mistreatment center. What a joke. "Are U my mother? Are U my father?" Looking for family people. Hey we all have our crosses 2 bare. We all have our wars to fight. Then Pan. Peter Pan and the Gin, Pan. My X again. The whole jumping from the skillet to the fry pan. I was wondering why I was seeing myself standing inside a bottle like I dream of Jeannie hitting the cork with my fist "let me out of the bottle?"
Foreplay, Long Time/ Boston
Awesome title. Last night I got taken back to the gifts people brought in to the "Orphanage For Lost Mothers." I was usually gone, thank God. I appreciate it but give it to someone who needs it. I don't need another item, or bag to saddle me down. Then the girl scouts come in and drop off gifts with our names. I had to accept. U know accept anything freely given. I cried when I opened them they were red gloves with black bats. How very Wednesday of me. Back to the Adam's family I go. Mr. Wednesday on American Gods turns out 2B Odin. I recon my family and I have a dark sense of humor. That mother nature side, that lil' beasty side of my family tree's whit and humor. "The Wicked Witch Of The West" here to take down this house of cards, wall street and religion. Then I remembered the song, "Little Red Riding Hood" this morning remembering Michael telling me "he wants to cut off my children's heads and mail them to me in a box?" Not Michail himself but that dragon he had on his head. His Big Bad Wolfe came to light. Right after I stepped out with my back pack, standing in front of mama bear? Talk about "The Silver Fox And The 3 Bears" feeling by the second time around apparently still being hidden from the serpent in Revelations. Learning the bear is a Lakota thing.
Awesome title. Last night I got taken back to the gifts people brought in to the "Orphanage For Lost Mothers." I was usually gone, thank God. I appreciate it but give it to someone who needs it. I don't need another item, or bag to saddle me down. Then the girl scouts come in and drop off gifts with our names. I had to accept. U know accept anything freely given. I cried when I opened them they were red gloves with black bats. How very Wednesday of me. Back to the Adam's family I go. Mr. Wednesday on American Gods turns out 2B Odin. I recon my family and I have a dark sense of humor. That mother nature side, that lil' beasty side of my family tree's whit and humor. "The Wicked Witch Of The West" here to take down this house of cards, wall street and religion. Then I remembered the song, "Little Red Riding Hood" this morning remembering Michael telling me "he wants to cut off my children's heads and mail them to me in a box?" Not Michail himself but that dragon he had on his head. His Big Bad Wolfe came to light. Right after I stepped out with my back pack, standing in front of mama bear? Talk about "The Silver Fox And The 3 Bears" feeling by the second time around apparently still being hidden from the serpent in Revelations. Learning the bear is a Lakota thing.
I Got A Line On U/Spirit and Road Less Traveled/LA
Sitting on the couch this morning about 4, I got a flash of me literally picking Kyle up and swinging him over my head and throwing him. What was going through my mind? The word's "HOT MESS IS RIGHT." That was someone's answer to me when I asked "if they knew him? U don't want none of that. That man is a hot mess." I saw that just in a different way. The loss and having to keep going. The loneliness and the cancer. I mean even if they are gone that is quite a history. Then what do I say in my mind walking up2 take his order? "Great, just my luck, fall in love with a guy and he up and dies on me." Boom cancer again, being kidnapped, shot three times, 1 missed and while in the hospital cheated on, and cancer again. That is drive. That is your Jobe. That one with his ring of fire that he is still not sure about all this himself..
Sitting on the couch this morning about 4, I got a flash of me literally picking Kyle up and swinging him over my head and throwing him. What was going through my mind? The word's "HOT MESS IS RIGHT." That was someone's answer to me when I asked "if they knew him? U don't want none of that. That man is a hot mess." I saw that just in a different way. The loss and having to keep going. The loneliness and the cancer. I mean even if they are gone that is quite a history. Then what do I say in my mind walking up2 take his order? "Great, just my luck, fall in love with a guy and he up and dies on me." Boom cancer again, being kidnapped, shot three times, 1 missed and while in the hospital cheated on, and cancer again. That is drive. That is your Jobe. That one with his ring of fire that he is still not sure about all this himself..
Feeling Alright/JC and I Go Back/KC
Having to tell someone "your a Freyr not the monk and she is Freya, turns out your fertility Gods?" The answer when he got up with his coffee going out to smoke, "hmmmm! 7 kids, all girls, all ADHD with 2 set's of twins and 2 bout's of cancer and I'm still alive, isn't that odd?" I was thinking in my head "yeah, that is pretty odd." Not good odds this ones life span and love. No way. Then I'm standing on an oil can doing fertility Goddess rituals, and well plenty of other rituals it turns out before that day? Then my reply "uhm why am I doing fertility Goddess ritual's when I only have 2 daughters? Then I say to Alex after seeing Big Ben with the kite, "that's mother natures lightening rod, our nine lives are up." Then I'm working with the 3,6, and 9's? Then I trek into town and used Angels 101, those names and numbers as my guide's. Then the 9 knocks in "The Conjuring Of Jack Parsons. Then the alter that was set up, after the 10 plagues that God and your mother created with Moses, the burning bush and those 10 broken commandments. Yeah I rocked back between the 9's and 10's for awhile. Kyle telling me 3 more. The little boy standing in Michail definitely a 10 year old boy with 2 Egyptians standing behind him. What number on God's altar 9? The 7 with the 2 candlesticks. The blood of God's lamb sacrificed and spread up above the doors for God not to touch when H/ER storm's tore through. That sure is some energy in that story line in just those four element's wouldn't you say?
Having to tell someone "your a Freyr not the monk and she is Freya, turns out your fertility Gods?" The answer when he got up with his coffee going out to smoke, "hmmmm! 7 kids, all girls, all ADHD with 2 set's of twins and 2 bout's of cancer and I'm still alive, isn't that odd?" I was thinking in my head "yeah, that is pretty odd." Not good odds this ones life span and love. No way. Then I'm standing on an oil can doing fertility Goddess rituals, and well plenty of other rituals it turns out before that day? Then my reply "uhm why am I doing fertility Goddess ritual's when I only have 2 daughters? Then I say to Alex after seeing Big Ben with the kite, "that's mother natures lightening rod, our nine lives are up." Then I'm working with the 3,6, and 9's? Then I trek into town and used Angels 101, those names and numbers as my guide's. Then the 9 knocks in "The Conjuring Of Jack Parsons. Then the alter that was set up, after the 10 plagues that God and your mother created with Moses, the burning bush and those 10 broken commandments. Yeah I rocked back between the 9's and 10's for awhile. Kyle telling me 3 more. The little boy standing in Michail definitely a 10 year old boy with 2 Egyptians standing behind him. What number on God's altar 9? The 7 with the 2 candlesticks. The blood of God's lamb sacrificed and spread up above the doors for God not to touch when H/ER storm's tore through. That sure is some energy in that story line in just those four element's wouldn't you say?
Rock Steady?BC I'll Be/EM
Is God just a theory? Is H/er son, Jesus Christ? How about that daughter? Mary Mag? How about that Holy Mother,? Mother Mary? Didn't she weep bloody tear drops? That's a miracle right there? Then I find out mother nature's name is Mary. Being raised by Zion Mary for this rock? Fuck me in the ass and get it over already. Hey how about that name Mary Cochran Stone? Her emotions when I say her name right out on my video? Goal release date Halloween. Just going through some namesakes in this family tree line.
Is God just a theory? Is H/er son, Jesus Christ? How about that daughter? Mary Mag? How about that Holy Mother,? Mother Mary? Didn't she weep bloody tear drops? That's a miracle right there? Then I find out mother nature's name is Mary. Being raised by Zion Mary for this rock? Fuck me in the ass and get it over already. Hey how about that name Mary Cochran Stone? Her emotions when I say her name right out on my video? Goal release date Halloween. Just going through some namesakes in this family tree line.
Green Grass and High Tides/The Outlaws and When The Stars Go Blue/TM
Just that word being mentioned again this last week? Namesake, God Dammit to hell already. On both sides of this treeline. Someday Alex will laugh about some of the hell her mother has been through getting hooked to the chain gang upstairs in this family tree line. When some one said Alex is pregnant, I about lost it. Never this. To throw babies in the ring in this family tree line, not at this time. Then the other shoe dropped. Oh yeah always another God Damn shoe in this family. You know that "Murphy's Law" thing I used to say allot to myself in my younger years, "if something is going to go wrong it will." Why? no better way to learn than personal hand's on experience. It is you upstairs whom hasn't learned anything. No it is you that literally just keeps repeating history. You just look better doing it. Talk about repeat history.
Just that word being mentioned again this last week? Namesake, God Dammit to hell already. On both sides of this treeline. Someday Alex will laugh about some of the hell her mother has been through getting hooked to the chain gang upstairs in this family tree line. When some one said Alex is pregnant, I about lost it. Never this. To throw babies in the ring in this family tree line, not at this time. Then the other shoe dropped. Oh yeah always another God Damn shoe in this family. You know that "Murphy's Law" thing I used to say allot to myself in my younger years, "if something is going to go wrong it will." Why? no better way to learn than personal hand's on experience. It is you upstairs whom hasn't learned anything. No it is you that literally just keeps repeating history. You just look better doing it. Talk about repeat history.
Reason 2 Believe/Rod Stewart finally some Rod. and Waitin' On A Woman/BP
Kyle keep's asking "why are you so mad at me? What did I do?" I feel like such a jack ass. I keep trying to explain I'm not mad at you personally, it's the situation. It's what we represent. He doesn't understand why others keep being angry with him too and behaving liking Judas all of a sudden? It's the fear inside people of who we represent. The end yet the beginning. He doesn't understand that no I am not in love with you. Nothing personal. Regardless of what they've shown me, get real! I said in the beginning to him, "I agreed 2 look crazy." Then they make me look like a stalker. He even got interviewed somehow after I was raped? I didn't know his name when I went in to ask what the protocol was? I told the police he's on camera and the time he walked out behind me. It was this clerk that called the police and said "theirs a a hooker on the lot. Where's the proof of that? I never approached anyone or asked anyone for anything. I paid for my shit on that lot. Truth is after all this I still don't know him. He's still a stranger, in a weird way not. That my anger at him in the beginning was the turmoil inside without knowing what and whom we represent up there. Yeah it sucks being in the Mary Madgelane family tree line. The shit magnet for bad behavior. Eve, naive Eve who just happened to of had such a broken picker she married the serpent from the garden? No I don't need saving it's his family tree line and my family tree line that has me worked up.
Kyle keep's asking "why are you so mad at me? What did I do?" I feel like such a jack ass. I keep trying to explain I'm not mad at you personally, it's the situation. It's what we represent. He doesn't understand why others keep being angry with him too and behaving liking Judas all of a sudden? It's the fear inside people of who we represent. The end yet the beginning. He doesn't understand that no I am not in love with you. Nothing personal. Regardless of what they've shown me, get real! I said in the beginning to him, "I agreed 2 look crazy." Then they make me look like a stalker. He even got interviewed somehow after I was raped? I didn't know his name when I went in to ask what the protocol was? I told the police he's on camera and the time he walked out behind me. It was this clerk that called the police and said "theirs a a hooker on the lot. Where's the proof of that? I never approached anyone or asked anyone for anything. I paid for my shit on that lot. Truth is after all this I still don't know him. He's still a stranger, in a weird way not. That my anger at him in the beginning was the turmoil inside without knowing what and whom we represent up there. Yeah it sucks being in the Mary Madgelane family tree line. The shit magnet for bad behavior. Eve, naive Eve who just happened to of had such a broken picker she married the serpent from the garden? No I don't need saving it's his family tree line and my family tree line that has me worked up.
Sweet Home Alabama/LS and 2night Looks Good On U/JA
Oh and it gets better, I'm the kid sister, the mother and the wife? Every day I say in my head "I hate this rock." I know Gaia nothing personal. Your getting sucked and pumped. Mined and fracked each day in one form or the other just like me. I wrote in my blog yesterday, "I really did place my burdens on Kyle." The reason for that monkey he carries growing by 10 at a time like this? Then it sunk in like The Titanic, I too got handed his load right from the start. By ten and now 13 or 14, I've lost track. Forgive me. Sarcasm intended.
Oh and it gets better, I'm the kid sister, the mother and the wife? Every day I say in my head "I hate this rock." I know Gaia nothing personal. Your getting sucked and pumped. Mined and fracked each day in one form or the other just like me. I wrote in my blog yesterday, "I really did place my burdens on Kyle." The reason for that monkey he carries growing by 10 at a time like this? Then it sunk in like The Titanic, I too got handed his load right from the start. By ten and now 13 or 14, I've lost track. Forgive me. Sarcasm intended.
Killer Queen/Queen and You'll Think Of Me/K
Thinking about Gaia, how she kisses her beasty's on the head? I do the same thing. Forehead, head and the tip of the nose. Children and beasty's alike. Seeing the original mother standing alone in her animal kingdom? To me in an odd way that is heaven. My circle of life not mankind. My destroyer's of the very hand that feeds them. I got flashed in to a scene where I was stomping through the woods one morning tired of this long wet walk out of the woods just to get a pack of smokes. I yelled up "ain't no man worth all this." They agreed. I was shocked but happy with that answer. I step out of the woods and a biting chill tore through me. I said "bitch." Referring to mother nature, then I laughed realizing that is just the point. My mother is this animal kingdom and yes she can be a bitch. It's her job. She was feeding this animal kingdom and this circle of life long B4 you as man came along. Then that evening the next answer came, I recon the other side. The male side of the family tree line. What did I hear? "No, but your brother and father are." I didn't need the question to that answer.
Runnin With The Devil/VH and 2day Was A Fairy Tail/TS
The cards I pulled today on whom it is I am working with was Green Tara, compassion and love. Lady Nada, another energy of Mary Madgelane. Awaken to the divine acceptance of love. Give and receive in balance. Not! Nada! That has never happened. I have never had balance in love. She's from Atlantis and the spiritual priestess of love. She helps awaken us to the divine love we deserve. To remind us when true love and divine love is present their are no obstacles. Except one, well two? Me and trust? Not trust in the divine plan it's me and him I don't trust. I don't trust you with this part right here and that is the Gods honest Truth. It's not attention or pity. I just really don't trust this. I feel like I'm being forced with this part, knowing what your knowing is, as a human I don't trust it or that with him, let alone anyone. Even after all this why the flock should I? Sorry Big Daddy your gonna have 2 do better up there, because it ain't working to get me over this hurdle. Of course I have compassion and passion. I could do that all day long, just not trust.
Mother/JL and Boondock's/LBT
The third card Krishna which is Devotion, whose twin flame is Radha. He is an Avatar. Sweet! He even say's you probably feel like you've been on an emotional rollercoaster ride? You think? He is Wisdom and a God of the feminine spirit. He is to help with fear. Imagine that? Out of everything I don't fear, I recon it's love I fear? I admit I'm devoted to you all up there, whatever you want me to do. Aside from compassion, and well passion for him and his children, all they've gone through? Still yet to go through? On both sides of the fence? It's this man thing? Maybe I'm being to human and realistic? I feel love for mankind just not sure about the man? Can't I just go home skip this part, the happily ever after I still don't believe in for myself?
A Broken Wing/M.McBride
Magic Carpet Ride/Steppenwolf/ and Who I Am/JA
Yeah, a crazy white cracker that need's to go back to the reservation. Asshole family. I don't care how much love I reject. Talk about "Big Daddy" issue's I ain't ever asked for? Upstairs nor down stair's. You all up there literally want me to go back on the chain gang? Tie myself to another man and sit in their shit? Thank you and no thank you!
The Jack/AC/DC
The End/The Doors
Thinking about Gaia, how she kisses her beasty's on the head? I do the same thing. Forehead, head and the tip of the nose. Children and beasty's alike. Seeing the original mother standing alone in her animal kingdom? To me in an odd way that is heaven. My circle of life not mankind. My destroyer's of the very hand that feeds them. I got flashed in to a scene where I was stomping through the woods one morning tired of this long wet walk out of the woods just to get a pack of smokes. I yelled up "ain't no man worth all this." They agreed. I was shocked but happy with that answer. I step out of the woods and a biting chill tore through me. I said "bitch." Referring to mother nature, then I laughed realizing that is just the point. My mother is this animal kingdom and yes she can be a bitch. It's her job. She was feeding this animal kingdom and this circle of life long B4 you as man came along. Then that evening the next answer came, I recon the other side. The male side of the family tree line. What did I hear? "No, but your brother and father are." I didn't need the question to that answer.
Runnin With The Devil/VH and 2day Was A Fairy Tail/TS
The cards I pulled today on whom it is I am working with was Green Tara, compassion and love. Lady Nada, another energy of Mary Madgelane. Awaken to the divine acceptance of love. Give and receive in balance. Not! Nada! That has never happened. I have never had balance in love. She's from Atlantis and the spiritual priestess of love. She helps awaken us to the divine love we deserve. To remind us when true love and divine love is present their are no obstacles. Except one, well two? Me and trust? Not trust in the divine plan it's me and him I don't trust. I don't trust you with this part right here and that is the Gods honest Truth. It's not attention or pity. I just really don't trust this. I feel like I'm being forced with this part, knowing what your knowing is, as a human I don't trust it or that with him, let alone anyone. Even after all this why the flock should I? Sorry Big Daddy your gonna have 2 do better up there, because it ain't working to get me over this hurdle. Of course I have compassion and passion. I could do that all day long, just not trust.
Mother/JL and Boondock's/LBT
The third card Krishna which is Devotion, whose twin flame is Radha. He is an Avatar. Sweet! He even say's you probably feel like you've been on an emotional rollercoaster ride? You think? He is Wisdom and a God of the feminine spirit. He is to help with fear. Imagine that? Out of everything I don't fear, I recon it's love I fear? I admit I'm devoted to you all up there, whatever you want me to do. Aside from compassion, and well passion for him and his children, all they've gone through? Still yet to go through? On both sides of the fence? It's this man thing? Maybe I'm being to human and realistic? I feel love for mankind just not sure about the man? Can't I just go home skip this part, the happily ever after I still don't believe in for myself?
A Broken Wing/M.McBride
Magic Carpet Ride/Steppenwolf/ and Who I Am/JA
Yeah, a crazy white cracker that need's to go back to the reservation. Asshole family. I don't care how much love I reject. Talk about "Big Daddy" issue's I ain't ever asked for? Upstairs nor down stair's. You all up there literally want me to go back on the chain gang? Tie myself to another man and sit in their shit? Thank you and no thank you!
The Jack/AC/DC
The End/The Doors
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