Purging

 I am so sick of this. I got it long ago balance and justice. I asked so I'm a little Toa. The yin yang. One of Gwen's expressions. Put it up his yin yang. Trident and Wrigley? Asswipe's birthdate and numbers? Hey U gave him this number. God never said, just how the beast would B marked. Christopher, they don't like him. 2 birds flew up when I asked why? Then I hear the other clue, Assassins' Creed, the apple and religion? Christopher Columbus was the religion that wanted the essence of the apple. The Serpent in the garden. Another part when the serpent married his first love it will B Armageddon. That black heart is incapable of love. Love, it was all about money guilt and blame. Then just one of my ten twelves from the start his birthdate? 10/12. Balance. There really was not ever balanced from the start, no Yin and yang in any of it. I mean come on Aleister Alexander Crowley's birthday. Same birthday as Greg. The birthdate along with his 666's, not a good sign.

I have Faith. I mean how can I not? I literally live with one of the dumbest arc angels. Michael the arc angel is being blocked by a little demon boy. It doesn't matter how much I have connected the dots? In one ear and out the other. I can tell him proof, over the head. Another fly by. 

I never realized what it means 2 B the God Daughter of all. Thy Kingdom Cum thy will B done. On earth as it is in heaven. Heaven on earth baby. thru out history and time it is said Armageddon and oh what a revelation this journey has been, walking back thru my history past, present, future. I assure U, I've been thoroughly screwed, inside and out. I am who I am, I like myself and my family tree line just fine. 

He made everything so hard. The cheapest quality. After me driving with around 1970, a very dangerous truck. He would not acknowledge. It wasn't logical to be pregnant with the 2nd child and still have no thot, what am I going to drive with 2 car seats? I put my duty in and 3 years later saying U just had to have that truck. I didn't get paid and no credit for a God Damned thing. No acknowledgement just a wave of a hand and oh she'll be fine. No empathy or thot for her well-being. I gave him a journal in Sunnyvale and asked him to write down his emotion's no matter what they are when our friend Wes lost his leg. A healthy way to purge your emotions. To get them out become aware and move to the next step, the next emotion. 

He is emotionless at the cruel things he said and did. My tone. for one, Am I worthy to eat a large fry, to even pay for a large fry? Telling a woman who either hands it over or shares without thought. This is his way of telling me I don't share, I'm being shellfish, and I am unworthy to pay for or eat. Looking back, they're right it was always some kind of accusation, the undertones of blame. How many times did I did my usual slow turn of the head when he said something off the wall, shocking? The common denominator is saying out loud that I blame him for the pain. Blaim and pain

They have been thru every car that has been sold out under me. From a teenager to him and another did too. He wanted my car, and it was cooler than his and he drove the hell out of it. I'm still angry that it's me. I know U think it's God, and it it's cool to do what I have to do? Clean this rock, clean this house. Oh yes, I have to do my part. That if I don't show up by his side other than just the guy's. He was angry if I didn't go. he demanded, not one please or thank U from him for anything