To think rightj off the bat I got taken back to that pause moment? The 4 times I almost drown. The locations and the names and roles of people in my life, the one's who lifted me or pulled me out? Cowlitz river my first number 4 in my life. I was 4 years old. It was my sister. Age 7 Kelso Washington in a pool I slipped into the center, and my cousin James is trying to reach me. I'm holding my right hand up so he could reach me. Hawaii I think Hawaii was 16 or 17. Just kept getting pulled further and further out to sea. George Paddleford and his friend bring a board out and put me on it. My Honey moon, looking down at one of the sites in Hawaii the tolilet bowl. I was rolling around under and a big Somaone guy blocked the Crack and pulled me up. Greg didn't even notice. He laughed put his hand on my shoulder and walked away.
It's not Me/3 Doors Down
I can't get over the last alien that showed up in broad day light. I saw a red towel and I have 2 go by the entrance to the kitchen. I turned around telling myself I did not see that. Then I heear my bathroom door go bang. NOw I'm telling myself nope I did not hear that either. Then I heard what she said and I knew why? I just hadn't processed what she clearly said? I laid down early bcuz as the day went on my muscles were geting weaker. I needed to rest them if I wanted to be able to move freely soon. I lift myself off my couch I make it 2 the front door. My hand On the knob.
Killshot?eminem
I turn and I C her go from my bathroom to my bedroom still holding the red towel over her shouulders. I get like 12 feet from my door and I collapse. I can't move a muscle. So I laid there. I tried texting Sarah later I realized it was incoherent. My muscles didn't work. After about an hour my neighbors who had just moved, came back for a load. It took both of them to lift me and drag me in2 my partment.
Thunder/ACDC
Then it struck me like a bolt of lightening just what she said quite clearly. Colleen I think U should know your mothr is on the lot still. Look what I do? I go outside when she's trying to warn me to help me. Then I wondered why she hid? I mean after all the alien's and spiritual beings in those stars and constellations, Our family. Where their is a life there is a soul. U don't own my souls. Just like when I stomped back to that black pipe after shaking a water bottle and black feather at it for like 4 hours. It was like almost 11 I think. I said those R my souls. Those souls belong to me. Then I walked up above and I pointed to where I stuck that staff in the ground. I piled garbage all around it. A milk carton and I bloody back bird on top. Then I continued my scream, my chant. Get the fuck off my Rock. Over and over my arms open wide. Stomping my feet.
Call Me/Shinedown
Then like lil miss muffet. I crossed my arms and sit on that grate. That over flow well. Just when I looked down, 2 black snake heads popped up. Well so did my tuffet. That isn't something you'd ever expect to C. Especiall of all time's? This is where I heard the word prohibition. That scarlet letter A and just what they did. They took over and industrialized U. U had no right's. U had no Truth. Alway's a minimizer, a liar. U no longer have Truth. The character asssaination these 2 did on me. After all that counceling, and mediums I went 2 and was still doing.
If Today Was Your Last Day
Fuck yeah and I had no shame. That is what they R there for. To help U find yourself again. I was put in purgsatory for ever going. All bcuz of that prayer that I said when that councelor told me, That isn't discipline, that's abuse. I cried with my hands in the air. Thankful I aborted Rose. I didn't want history to repeat itself. I didn't want to resesnt any1. I didn't want to ever be a single mother either. Knowing it takes 2. Weather your a mother or a father. Could B 2 mothers, or 2 fathers. As long as U love in your heart. If U break up the priority won't B money. Your done putting a price on my children's heads. All bcuz your unjustified system says so? Fuck U. Just Fuck U. I call Bullshit and I point my finger's up even higher than any justified system.
Everything Changes
Right thru those planet's and stars. Cum and get me. I assure U I've been thoroughly scweged about just who it is that I am? Yes I like myself just fine. On GAru's chest written backwards. Dante's Inferno, the seers with there heads tuned backwards? The Gifted the TV show. U hot the nail on the head right there. Hippa Emotions and spititually? Number 9? I can only pray within a religion? Fuck U. I'm Freedom and thereaint no freedom up in this house. Oh hell know based on pharmaceuticals, labeling U and turning off the higher beings? The schizophrenic? U blocked evolution all Bcuz U wanted to profit off of there losses from everything from the inside out.
Arms Widw OPen
Funny U can't say Jesus Christ anywhere but a box. A home ot church. Jesus was here for his mother. U try figuring out just wwhick mother. Your sister, Your daughter. Your wife and her seed, or my son. The reason why the Bride in the beginning. I hated this word. Everytime I'd yell. Then next in the bible on the fateway sum quote off the History Channel, IC it.
The Bride/Groom, The Alpha/Omega and biblically He/SHE. There was a time I wondered why so many women born with dicks? Now I know. I know why he kept saying 2 me? I was standing right there. I was standing right there. Long b4 this it went thru my head that I feel like my guirdian angel is banging her head on a rock. Now I find out it;s a he and he's inside of me. He's been hiding. I don't know how many times he came out and point blank said Your talking to Jesus Christ. The first time end of November 2015. I scribed in shock, then I went to bed and forgot all about it. I just moved forward. I disccovered I learned this triat in my childhood. Letting things go. No acknoweldedgment or appology. To survive being raised by a narcisistic socipoath. U learn to do nothing to let things go or I'd never of survived. Be a victim or feel sorry for myself. I had wondered about just this my whole life? It never seemed to end. Letting things go and moving foward. To thine Own Self Be True.
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