1988-1989
U started this cross training to go on our resumes. It turns out your idea was to get twicw the amount of work out of one person. I should know I worked at boeing and Lockheed bot compainies I had to move the emgineer vault or file room. This was office space especially Lockheed. My children are no longer you flare for you corporate America.
Our temp jobs used o be good jobs to get your foot in the door anywhere. Hands on experience was the key. You corporate America has turned everything into an education. Not smart enuf for you anymore?
You think I don't see the process of your one world order. That is just one of the trojan horses that is here in the land of freedom wiping out freedom.
It seems that you big brother and corporate America think that Gods flock is your garden to industrialize.
1996
The signing of the HIPPA spirituality and emotions.You literally allowed the depressors from the 20's to depress the human body today.
2000
You abused your power as a school system, you went ahead and passed these laws because you were in charge of immunizations
.
This was when our computer systems were supposed to shut down, and instead in the school system you already had it set up to diagnose my indigo children, ADHD. You patronized the parents and we weren't allowed to ask a question about our own children.
You were also counseling the children of divorced parents.
We couldn't transfer our children out of a class
My daughter couldn't have red highlights in her hair like her mommies
Now you want to diagnose 12 year olds for depression.
Was this also the year that you corporate america passed laws that we weren't allowed to defend ourselves in the work.
Our children were being taught to pass a test. All this homework. You dictated our time at home with our children.
You control the ingress and egress on the streets that have schools. You don't get to have that kind of control.
We couldn't cheer for our children at sports events, because the system says so.
It was also around this time or just after that you dropped the 20 something an hour jobs down to 8 bucks. My mother worked for AG as a cherry picker.
My neighbor across the street was a manager at taco time making 20 something an hour and after the owner died, (I met him at BBWA) his son dropped all the wages down to 8 bucks an hour.
Look how long it took you to get back up to 15 bucks an hour and still allot of people aren't making that. You even gave yourself a 7 year amortization for pay raises about 7 years ago? You want to tell me how all this adds up to making a living?
I am a watcher and my paws moments was these things
The signing of the HIPPA
Driving by group death at a time when they were writing for the same antibiotic 3 times before the doctors could write for a fourth. All at a time when parents were both having to work to pay the bills.
This poisonous apple of an insurance.
Monday, February 18, 2019
Saturday, February 16, 2019
First year in new house
4 months pregnant working as a receptionist at an architect firm, also had to move this company.
I had two homes that were finished that I had picked out in the same price range. One needed the backyard and fence redone.
Greg wanted more bang for his buck. Why not he knew he had the jack of all trades for a wife. Someone to do all his packing and hauling cleaning up his messes every where he went. He picked out a backwards L shaped house that had no character or charm. It was sectioned off into 3 different sections.
His parents preached a fixer upper. We couldn't get them to go and help us look and choose.
We commuted in one car. Every morning I counted 9 ant hills on the way to work. I'd drop Greg off in Bellevue and then I'd go to work. After I'd have to sit in the office for 2 to 3 hours and wait for him to get off.
The first thing we did was put in a wood stove. Little did I know that heat was going to be an issue with Greg. Having a new born and to make things cheaper it was my job to haul in the wood and keep this wood stove lit. I wasn't allowed to turn the heat on in the kitchen. As a new mom of course I'm in the kitchen allot. (Somehow the heat and heat bill became my responsibility. During these years I changed the heat out three times.) Greg for one year didn't finsh the wall above wood stove. It was a friend of mine since junior high, he came out and spent the night. Shane and I were having coffee in the living room and he asked me how long had that wall looked like that? I said one year. Tanner explained to me about drywall, that it is the easiest and cheapest thing to do to a home. If it doesn't work it's cheap enuf to tear out and do it again.
I wasn't allowed to hire someone to help me and Greg wasn't going to do it either. I remember standing in the kitchen explaining to Greg that we just bought a fixer upper. That not only do we have work to do just to get this house up and running but we have seasonal work to do ever year. We have maintenance to do to maintain it. That is when I started tearing into my house myself. The more I did or learned to do, it was the more I was expected to do to make it cheaper. He nit picked me about the stuff I needed to do just to do the work myself.
I had already made the crib set in California. All I needed to do was put the ruffle on the quilt and finish the bumper pads for the crib.
I painted the nursery with balloon borders. The crib set was primary colored bears with balloons.
I got a pedestal sink and tri-fold mirror on sale for the main bathroom. I called Bob Greg's dad to come and help. They didn't put the mirror back in and for 3 weeks every time I'd walk past the main bathroom door I'd get hit with a spike migraine. It was the smell of death. He wouldn't budge nor did he care, I had to call Greg's dad again.
At four months out of the blue I had almost miscarried Alex and was put on full time bed rest. I asked my doctor to put in my file part time bed rest. I knew I just bought a house and we couldn't afford for me to stop working. When I told Greg that evening in the car, he punched me in the arm and said I can do it.
I got a phone call from Greg just after, he volunteered me to put on a garage sale for a patient of his. I said no. I mean I didn't even have furniture. I almost miscarried Alex. He told me I was being rude and that I have to do my part.
Greg and Elaine thot it would be a fun idea to make flax packs. After we'd get home from work I'd be sewing flax packs for extra money. Which I never saw.
7 months I still had no furniture. I was laying and sitting on the floor. Greg had no concept about this. I borrowed the red beast, an old Ford truck from Bob, Greg's dad. I went from Everett all the way to Sumner warehouse until I found the quality of furniture I wanted for the price. I brought this home.
My aunt and uncle had given me an armior for Alex's room. It was dark wood and I was repainting it in the kitchen. I still needed to do one more coat and toward the end of my pregnancy Greg tells me I need to finish it. The kitchen was so airy our blinds moved with the breeze. The sheet rock under the counters wasn't connected to the walls. I had fake brick hanging from my walls. I didn't open a window and Greg stood there berating me for not thinking of my unborn child. What about the mother Greg?
I was sitting one day at the kitchen counter at Greg's parent's house. I was looking at nursery set's getting idea's. It was this family that shit on my parade any chance they had. They down graded me any chance they got. Elaine said "Colleen you just want to have new nice things. You don't need that. You can take Greg and Stave's old crib, and play pen." I tried explaining that it wasn't up to code. She said that was hogwash. It was brown not my colors for the nursery at all. I put James' Grateful Dead bears at the head to make it at least blend. The play pen had 2 large holes on the side. At 9 weeks I lifted the side and all the slats fell out. Thankfully my friend Steph had a white crib that she just finished using with her son.
Greg wanted to save 10 bucks on a Christmas tree. He took me and my 2 lil dogs Wrigley and Trident, one was black the other white, up into the mountains on a rutted road. Here I am about ready to deliver Alex. My dog's were screaming they were so cold. Greg is searching. Finally I say to Greg just pick a tree, it's freezing. I had to help him cut down a tree and haul it out of the woods. When we got home I noticed a lil birds nest in the tree toward the back where their were less branches. I cried inside, I felt so bad.
Greg couldn't slow down. Nothing stopped Greg from doing what he wanted to do when he wanted to do it. It was up to me to do all the packing and hauling. We still attended every gathering, it was holiday time. Yet it was me preparing and bring the food or making or purchasing the gifts. Usually I made everything myself. Greg and I attended a yearly Christmas party at Kelly and Joe's house. Guess where this location is? The gateway. On our way there Christmas 1994, and we were on the back roads almost there, and I got hit spike with a good old fashioned migraine. I yelled oww! I grabbed my head. Greg asked what it was and I told him. Greg would not turn around and take me home. Instead we went and he got drunk on Royal Crown with some shmuck, whom only spoke to Greg when he wanted something, an adjustment for free or one night they got drunk outside me and my girls trailer. What I needed was to go to the hospital. Instead I had to wait until the party is over so I can be Greg's designated driver. He never checked in on me or ask me how I'm doing?
One night we were watching a comedy. It was a woman giving birth yelling at her husband for doing this to her. He looked at me and told me if I blamed him for the pain that he is walking out and leaving me. This family was good at that. Abandonment. Not allowed to have any emotions. I wasn't allowed to defend myself against their accusations. I wasn't allowed to defend myself against their bad behavior. Basically I was told to sit in this families shit and don't speak.
I don't know why Greg went to Lamaze class with me? I had been up all night the 2 previous nights. On the 3rd night I went into labor. I screamed in whispers on all 4's in the spare bedroom so as not to wake up his heinous. I went out about 4:30 to wake him and tell him it's time to go. A contraction hit, and I hit the floor on all fours Greg stood over me and asked if I'm sure I hurt bad enough to go yet?
I got there at about a 4 and a half in dilation. We had to call Greg's parent's and convince them to come. You see Elaine had asked if she could come stay for three weeks to help with Alex? I said thank you, I appreciate it. I'd appreciate even more if you could wait three weeks because Greg is taking 3 weeks off to help me with the baby, and I'd like for him to bond with her and learn to take care of her. I had no idea her feelings were hurt, and even then in this family I had to put up with the bad behavior of some one else's feelings. I was already the type of person to think of others and help others when they needed it hands down.
Greg was calling friends and family. I delivered Alex at 3:16p.m. When someone wanted to talk to me I was to tired to chat. Greg told me I was being rude
We couldn't even get Bob and Elaine to bring us the key's to our house. Sue had ours. I went in to labor about three weeks early and I didn't have the basinet sheets washed. We had to meet Elaine in a parking lot.
My dishwasher broke during this time. I was breast feeding Alex, I asked if he could do some dishes? Greg's answer was this is his vacation too. He didn't lift a finger to do dishes or laundry. He thot it would be fun to cook on the wood stove and he just left the dishes there. Every dish was dirty. Elaine showed up with her friends and didn't lift a finger to help. Nor did she ever come to help me after those three weeks with Greg.I told Greg taking care of my child isn't like work to me, because I was prepared for this and she is just a part of me. I over heard Greg repeating the same words to this group of people. I looked at him and he at me. He was doing that V sign with his fingers. This was the sign he would do when he's copying me, or when at times I was almost killed.
The morning that Greg left to go back to work I was feeding Alex and I asked him if he could write a check to pay rent that day? He told me no it was my job.
In this house when we pulled the stove away from the wall, the wires were clumped together and taped with electrical tape.
We put in a garbage disposal,
My first refrigerator was an under the counter refrigerator. The second one that I had for years was the small refrigerator with the old fashioned ice box that you had to chisel and thaw with a hair dryer. Greg insisted we shopped at Costco because Greg had to have King size condiments. Guess whose job it was to clean this thing?
We were given a freezer. The box kind that sat on the ground. The old owner was a fisher and hunter. It took me four times and 2 days of soaking and cleaning that thing with bleach and Lysol. Whose job was it, to lift it on it's side to scrub and clean? Mine. Then I'd have to flip it back up to soak it.
About 2/3rds of my outlets didn't work.
In our closet the hangers were wider than the closet.
The awning was to low on the front door and we couldn't have a screen.
I had to make arrangements to have the tree's taken out. I had to remove big rocks from our yard before I could lay down soil and roll it. Thankfully Wes whom only had one leg was scooping dirt in a barrel for me. Mike Swanson and Rana came to help too. UC in my life all Greg had to do was show up and work for a couple hours then the job is done.
Everything in this house needed to be redone. Literally everything. Somehow it all became my responsibility. The yard front and back needed to be redone. The heat system somehow became my responsibility.
I had two homes that were finished that I had picked out in the same price range. One needed the backyard and fence redone.
Greg wanted more bang for his buck. Why not he knew he had the jack of all trades for a wife. Someone to do all his packing and hauling cleaning up his messes every where he went. He picked out a backwards L shaped house that had no character or charm. It was sectioned off into 3 different sections.
His parents preached a fixer upper. We couldn't get them to go and help us look and choose.
We commuted in one car. Every morning I counted 9 ant hills on the way to work. I'd drop Greg off in Bellevue and then I'd go to work. After I'd have to sit in the office for 2 to 3 hours and wait for him to get off.
The first thing we did was put in a wood stove. Little did I know that heat was going to be an issue with Greg. Having a new born and to make things cheaper it was my job to haul in the wood and keep this wood stove lit. I wasn't allowed to turn the heat on in the kitchen. As a new mom of course I'm in the kitchen allot. (Somehow the heat and heat bill became my responsibility. During these years I changed the heat out three times.) Greg for one year didn't finsh the wall above wood stove. It was a friend of mine since junior high, he came out and spent the night. Shane and I were having coffee in the living room and he asked me how long had that wall looked like that? I said one year. Tanner explained to me about drywall, that it is the easiest and cheapest thing to do to a home. If it doesn't work it's cheap enuf to tear out and do it again.
I wasn't allowed to hire someone to help me and Greg wasn't going to do it either. I remember standing in the kitchen explaining to Greg that we just bought a fixer upper. That not only do we have work to do just to get this house up and running but we have seasonal work to do ever year. We have maintenance to do to maintain it. That is when I started tearing into my house myself. The more I did or learned to do, it was the more I was expected to do to make it cheaper. He nit picked me about the stuff I needed to do just to do the work myself.
I had already made the crib set in California. All I needed to do was put the ruffle on the quilt and finish the bumper pads for the crib.
I painted the nursery with balloon borders. The crib set was primary colored bears with balloons.
I got a pedestal sink and tri-fold mirror on sale for the main bathroom. I called Bob Greg's dad to come and help. They didn't put the mirror back in and for 3 weeks every time I'd walk past the main bathroom door I'd get hit with a spike migraine. It was the smell of death. He wouldn't budge nor did he care, I had to call Greg's dad again.
At four months out of the blue I had almost miscarried Alex and was put on full time bed rest. I asked my doctor to put in my file part time bed rest. I knew I just bought a house and we couldn't afford for me to stop working. When I told Greg that evening in the car, he punched me in the arm and said I can do it.
I got a phone call from Greg just after, he volunteered me to put on a garage sale for a patient of his. I said no. I mean I didn't even have furniture. I almost miscarried Alex. He told me I was being rude and that I have to do my part.
Greg and Elaine thot it would be a fun idea to make flax packs. After we'd get home from work I'd be sewing flax packs for extra money. Which I never saw.
7 months I still had no furniture. I was laying and sitting on the floor. Greg had no concept about this. I borrowed the red beast, an old Ford truck from Bob, Greg's dad. I went from Everett all the way to Sumner warehouse until I found the quality of furniture I wanted for the price. I brought this home.
My aunt and uncle had given me an armior for Alex's room. It was dark wood and I was repainting it in the kitchen. I still needed to do one more coat and toward the end of my pregnancy Greg tells me I need to finish it. The kitchen was so airy our blinds moved with the breeze. The sheet rock under the counters wasn't connected to the walls. I had fake brick hanging from my walls. I didn't open a window and Greg stood there berating me for not thinking of my unborn child. What about the mother Greg?
I was sitting one day at the kitchen counter at Greg's parent's house. I was looking at nursery set's getting idea's. It was this family that shit on my parade any chance they had. They down graded me any chance they got. Elaine said "Colleen you just want to have new nice things. You don't need that. You can take Greg and Stave's old crib, and play pen." I tried explaining that it wasn't up to code. She said that was hogwash. It was brown not my colors for the nursery at all. I put James' Grateful Dead bears at the head to make it at least blend. The play pen had 2 large holes on the side. At 9 weeks I lifted the side and all the slats fell out. Thankfully my friend Steph had a white crib that she just finished using with her son.
Greg wanted to save 10 bucks on a Christmas tree. He took me and my 2 lil dogs Wrigley and Trident, one was black the other white, up into the mountains on a rutted road. Here I am about ready to deliver Alex. My dog's were screaming they were so cold. Greg is searching. Finally I say to Greg just pick a tree, it's freezing. I had to help him cut down a tree and haul it out of the woods. When we got home I noticed a lil birds nest in the tree toward the back where their were less branches. I cried inside, I felt so bad.
Greg couldn't slow down. Nothing stopped Greg from doing what he wanted to do when he wanted to do it. It was up to me to do all the packing and hauling. We still attended every gathering, it was holiday time. Yet it was me preparing and bring the food or making or purchasing the gifts. Usually I made everything myself. Greg and I attended a yearly Christmas party at Kelly and Joe's house. Guess where this location is? The gateway. On our way there Christmas 1994, and we were on the back roads almost there, and I got hit spike with a good old fashioned migraine. I yelled oww! I grabbed my head. Greg asked what it was and I told him. Greg would not turn around and take me home. Instead we went and he got drunk on Royal Crown with some shmuck, whom only spoke to Greg when he wanted something, an adjustment for free or one night they got drunk outside me and my girls trailer. What I needed was to go to the hospital. Instead I had to wait until the party is over so I can be Greg's designated driver. He never checked in on me or ask me how I'm doing?
One night we were watching a comedy. It was a woman giving birth yelling at her husband for doing this to her. He looked at me and told me if I blamed him for the pain that he is walking out and leaving me. This family was good at that. Abandonment. Not allowed to have any emotions. I wasn't allowed to defend myself against their accusations. I wasn't allowed to defend myself against their bad behavior. Basically I was told to sit in this families shit and don't speak.
I don't know why Greg went to Lamaze class with me? I had been up all night the 2 previous nights. On the 3rd night I went into labor. I screamed in whispers on all 4's in the spare bedroom so as not to wake up his heinous. I went out about 4:30 to wake him and tell him it's time to go. A contraction hit, and I hit the floor on all fours Greg stood over me and asked if I'm sure I hurt bad enough to go yet?
I got there at about a 4 and a half in dilation. We had to call Greg's parent's and convince them to come. You see Elaine had asked if she could come stay for three weeks to help with Alex? I said thank you, I appreciate it. I'd appreciate even more if you could wait three weeks because Greg is taking 3 weeks off to help me with the baby, and I'd like for him to bond with her and learn to take care of her. I had no idea her feelings were hurt, and even then in this family I had to put up with the bad behavior of some one else's feelings. I was already the type of person to think of others and help others when they needed it hands down.
Greg was calling friends and family. I delivered Alex at 3:16p.m. When someone wanted to talk to me I was to tired to chat. Greg told me I was being rude
We couldn't even get Bob and Elaine to bring us the key's to our house. Sue had ours. I went in to labor about three weeks early and I didn't have the basinet sheets washed. We had to meet Elaine in a parking lot.
My dishwasher broke during this time. I was breast feeding Alex, I asked if he could do some dishes? Greg's answer was this is his vacation too. He didn't lift a finger to do dishes or laundry. He thot it would be fun to cook on the wood stove and he just left the dishes there. Every dish was dirty. Elaine showed up with her friends and didn't lift a finger to help. Nor did she ever come to help me after those three weeks with Greg.I told Greg taking care of my child isn't like work to me, because I was prepared for this and she is just a part of me. I over heard Greg repeating the same words to this group of people. I looked at him and he at me. He was doing that V sign with his fingers. This was the sign he would do when he's copying me, or when at times I was almost killed.
The morning that Greg left to go back to work I was feeding Alex and I asked him if he could write a check to pay rent that day? He told me no it was my job.
In this house when we pulled the stove away from the wall, the wires were clumped together and taped with electrical tape.
We put in a garbage disposal,
My first refrigerator was an under the counter refrigerator. The second one that I had for years was the small refrigerator with the old fashioned ice box that you had to chisel and thaw with a hair dryer. Greg insisted we shopped at Costco because Greg had to have King size condiments. Guess whose job it was to clean this thing?
We were given a freezer. The box kind that sat on the ground. The old owner was a fisher and hunter. It took me four times and 2 days of soaking and cleaning that thing with bleach and Lysol. Whose job was it, to lift it on it's side to scrub and clean? Mine. Then I'd have to flip it back up to soak it.
About 2/3rds of my outlets didn't work.
In our closet the hangers were wider than the closet.
The awning was to low on the front door and we couldn't have a screen.
I had to make arrangements to have the tree's taken out. I had to remove big rocks from our yard before I could lay down soil and roll it. Thankfully Wes whom only had one leg was scooping dirt in a barrel for me. Mike Swanson and Rana came to help too. UC in my life all Greg had to do was show up and work for a couple hours then the job is done.
Everything in this house needed to be redone. Literally everything. Somehow it all became my responsibility. The yard front and back needed to be redone. The heat system somehow became my responsibility.
Unconditional Love
I see a man
I like what I see
I think your hot just the way you are
It's what I see on the inside
Your a beautiful man
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder
Once you have that nothing else matters
Love doesn't get any better than that
You know what that's called
unconditional love
Intimacy for life
I love you for who you are
Not what you are
Our bodies are just shells of who we are on the inside
It's the beauty of your heart that I see
I like what I see
I think your hot just the way you are
It's what I see on the inside
Your a beautiful man
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder
Once you have that nothing else matters
Love doesn't get any better than that
You know what that's called
unconditional love
Intimacy for life
I love you for who you are
Not what you are
Our bodies are just shells of who we are on the inside
It's the beauty of your heart that I see
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